BOYS v.s. GIRLS

I was on the sidelines of a “chariot race” at school.  All of our second graders were either being horses pulling the chariots (aka wagons lugged in from home), or charioteers (those getting to ride in the wagons).  My friend, Maureen, stood beside me.  She was screaming her lungs out at Katie to pull harder! Stay on course! Watch where her competitors were gaining on her!  I, on the other hand, was laughing at the antics while encouraging William to have fun, enjoy the moment.  I was basically thinking this is a second grade excuse to be outside on a beautiful day.  Maureen and I talked about our different reactions.  She said that she felt it was her responsibility to motivate her three girls to always do their best, to achieve, to beat out the boys when given the opportunity. I, on the other hand, felt like my four boys needed to be encouraged to have fun and NOT see every situation as an opportunity to compete. They needed to relax and realize winning wasn’t everything.  The bottom line: Katie went to Harvard on a soccer scholarship.  

IT'S WORTH IT

                       Philip, John holding William, Edward

It is 10:15 pm and I just got off the phone with Philip.  He is 31 – or is it 32? Yes! It’s 32.  A sidebar – since the time all the boys were over 21, I have had a hard time remembering how old they are.  I can easily tell you their birthdates with years, their birthweights even, but how old they are seems to confuse me. I mean with four children, their ages are always changing, right? My husband always knows so I just ask him. Anyway, back to the phone call.  Philip called me just to say hi.  When he was 9 and his lower lip wasstuck out in poutiness, or I was scrubbing the carpet after he had been sick (we finally realized he was allergic to pepperoni!), I never could have dreamed that one day he would call me (while he was waiting for Homeland to download) and really want to know how I was doing. Bottom line: It happens, it really does….they grow up and they love you and care about you – it is so worth it.

THE INFLUENCE NETWORK

The Influence Conference was started several years ago by Jess Connolly and Hayley Morgan. These two young women are God-inspired encouragers. They are avid bloggers/instagrammers. I took our son, William's girlfriend, Carolyn, to the conference. She is 24, living in New York, working with a creative agency, no children (yet!). Neither of us having a blog or beautiful, interesting products to sell, we considered ourselves the outliers. I was worried Carolyn would feel she had wasted her time, but her refreshing response was, "I am always excited to see different perspectives.”

Towards the end of the evening session on night 2 of the conference, Megan, Carolyn, and I found ourselves at a table with another young woman when I turned to her and introduced myself. Carolyn reached her hand over to greet our table mate who suddenly burst into tears. The session closed. Megan went up to her room to sleep (without her 2 and 5 year-olds to worry about!), while Carolyn and I found a quiet corner to minister to our new friend. The tears were all about a young mom who felt she had wasted her time and money getting a PhD. I mentioned that with a 2-year-old and a new baby, she was “in the weeds” but she had her whole life before her and there would be plenty of time to do all sorts of things – including using her hard earned education.  Carolyn, who is wise beyond her years, simply let Christ’s love shine right through her. We were an unusual trio but then God has some crazy ideas sometimes. I felt sure this connection, understanding and encouragement between women was happening all over that hotel.

So I want to recommend The Influence Network – check it out https://theinfluencenetwork.com/.  They are doing so much to encourage women through classes which are podcasts, community groups, blog connections – even a book club (they send out tons of books for free J).  All of their efforts build God’s kingdom, woman to woman. It is very inspiring.  

DAY #1

Here I am on Day 1 of writing a blog. I have no idea what I am doing except following the path I think God's leading me down. Several weeks ago, I attended a conference in Indianapolis. My 33-year-old niece was attending for the second year in a row. When she called to invite me to join her, I was so thrilled to get to spend the weekend with her, that I immediately said YES. I had not really investigated what it was all about. All I knew is that it was for young Christian women entrepreneurs - none of which described me but if Megan thought I would like it, I was up for it.

I entered the ballroom for the welcome session. There were four hundred of us. I am 60 years old, which made me about 25 years older than anyone else I saw (!) - many girls pregnant and many with babies in tow. I made a decision to just go with it, shrug off feelings of being out of place. God always has an interesting plan so I anticipated what it was, with eagerness.

So, here is what the weekend was about: GOD.  Every speaker shared their personal stories and how their reliance on God was essential to making it through the day. I would say most of the speakers were between 25 and 35, with children, making a living off of a blog or a business where they made something (they are called "creatives"). Instagram had a huge presence and your Instagram name was on your name tag - I was thrilled I had one! Social media is a strong force for these women. Most of them are making a living off their blog and Instagram. Isn't that so cool?!

God's presence was palpable. So much loving encouragement going around the room. And get this! There were Dads outside the conference rooms to take care of babies! The moms would take them, nurse them, let them sleep during the sessions, while dad worked on his computer but as soon as fussiness came on, Dad to the rescue.

But here is what I longed to tell this group of women, who were all trying so hard:

Relax just a little. Breathe. You don't have to change the great big world right this minute. You have an amazing influence over your own intimate world right at home, with your friends, with your community.  Having a ton of followers is great but keep it in perspective. Having little ones is really challenging, exhausting and stressful but so much fun too! They grow up - even next year should be easier than this (unless you have another baby!). I'm not saying it isn't incredibly hard - it is - but the rewards are undeniable.

I am excited to share my thoughts and have you share yours (if I get any followers - eek!). Look for moments in your day where you are right where you want to be, with whom you want to be, doing exactly what you want to do and recognize that as an “in the green” moment. - Bottom line: God loves you and has an amazing plan for you! Be sure to keep your ears open for that.